I see you staring at them,

those bags under my eyes.

It may look like it was from not sleeping for one night.

Little do you know,

those bags tell a story.

Of a twenty-seven year old woman,

who has aged so much in the last five years.

A woman who has experienced so much loss,

that sleep is non-existent anymore.

A woman who prays that someday,

sleep will come back.

A woman that closes her eyes each night,

says her prayers and counts her blessings,

and if she happens to get into that deep REM sleep,

she is only to be woken up from a terrible nightmare.

The ones that she wishes upon no one.

A woman who wishes that one night,

she just might be able to see her babies again.

So many people have told her,

that angels can speak to you when you are asleep.

She just keeps waiting and hoping for that day to be true.

Just to get to see them one more time,

growing, laughing, and playing,

and knowing that they are right where they need to be.

Those bags under my eyes may never go away,

but know that I am okay with that.

Sleep will come back one day,

it may happen sooner, or it may happen later.

©2015 Sheridan Johnson @Journey with the Johnsons. All Rights Reserved.

Coffee date, anyone?

Cheers to my first online virtual coffee date!

I am going to write to you (the readers) as if you were sitting right in front of me, about the upcoming events in my life! 🙂

First off, I would start with getting my coffee with french vanilla cream and one pink sugar.  It’s funny that if you would have asked me 10 years ago (in high school) I would have said “coffee is the worst tasting/smelling thing ever!”.  Well, fast forward a few years and going through nursing school, and then becoming a mom, definitely made me hop on the coffee band-wagon! But, if we were really on a date, I would definitely have to have a tasty treat (like donuts) to eat while sipping on my delicious coffee.


I would tell you that my brother and his bride-to-be officially announced their wedding date to everyone, and it’s definitely a lot sooner than we would have ever thought! 🙂

I would tell you that I am super excited about tomorrow.  For one main reason is that we are finally making a move to look into our future of moving out from renting to owning our first house! Oh and the most important part of tomorrow, is that we get to visit my Step-Dad (who I wrote the letter about here) and my Pop and check up on them! I love Seguin, and trying to fit all of the things that we want to do is sometimes hard, but making family a priority is a must! 🙂

I would also tell you that I am so excited to be able to get some days off(consecutive) in the near future, which makes everyone happy! I am already planning on how to relax as much as possible (even though, as a mom and a wife, relaxation doesn’t happen very often).

I would probably somewhat tell you how my sleep is so erratic these days.  Ever since we found out Rochelle had Trisomy 13, I stopped sleeping through the night.  I wake up so frequently every.single.night that I feel like I took a whole bunch of short naps, and have to function on such little deep sleep every day.  I bought a vivofit, and tracking my sleep with this watch, just confirms my lack of it.  I have tried taking benadryl on some nights that I just know I have to function better than my norm, and it appears that I wake up MORE when I take it.  Any suggestions?  I am not much about medication, but I work out, I don’t exactly eat the best all the time but I do try, and I try to go to bed at the same time most nights I work and stay up later the nights that I don’t work.  It has become more of a problem and I just want to find some help! 🙂

Lastly, I would tell you how much I am in love with the age of Brielle.  I LOVE the fact that she is now 2, and yes she definitely has her bad moments, but her good moments are just that, SO good. I love her independence, her joy, her laughter, and her ability to make you love her so much even when you are frustrated with her! I would tell you that God has blessed us with such a strong-willed two year old, that I know He is showing us the personalities of both her brother and her sister through her.

I would definitely enjoy my donut slowly and savor each delicious bite before finishing my coffee and we start packing our stuff up to head out!

I hope you enjoyed my first online virtual coffee date as much as I did! 🙂